Crazy innit? These things are sold in the public retail market, they’re one of the most complex items of equipment known to man, and yet they come with as much instructions as a feltpen.

Incidentally, this probably would have all been fine if you had a proper console, like a PS3

Mine runs fine. It’s the phone line that gives me grief. How many modern first world countries have phone lines that disconnect each time it rains? Sigh.